An acquaintance died the other day.  I feel kind of weird about it.  For the sake of privacy, I’ll call him “S.”  Tonight I sent this PM to a mutual acquaintance on Facebook, except I edited out the name of the deceased, the city, and the building where we all used to work.  I’m calling it “The Former Workplace” here.  I just felt like sharing.

Hi  ~

I’m trying to wrap my head around the “S” thing, and writing is usually my go-to method for sorting out my thoughts.  I decided to send you a message because your facebook post about him the other day got me thinking – about him, about you, about a lot of people.  I’m sorry if this is weird or inappropriate or anything.

It’s not like “S” and I were good friends.  I don’t even think we were friends, really.  Kind of like you and I.  I mean, we know each other well enough to BS in the hallway or the cafeteria at “The Former Workplace,” but we don’t purposefully contact each other.  “S” and I were drinking buddies for a while, back in the Day, but that was mostly because we used to go out and drink with the same people.  We weren’t even “friends” on Facebook.

He existed, though.  And that was a good thing.  When we’d run into each other we’d say hi and bullshit and have a laugh, then go back to our lives.  I was always happy to see him.  I think, technically, we’d have been considered acquaintances.

I’m like that with quite a few people.  It’s been several years since I’ve seen any of you.  I’ve been okay with it though, because there’s still that possibility I could run into you someday, somewhere.  Granted, the chances are very slim, but it’s still possible.  Hell, I think you moved to [city name] a while ago, and didn’t you get married not too long ago?

See?  I don’t even know the basics anymore.

Thinking about it all, I might be more sad about that than getting used to knowing I’ll never see “S” again.  I’m thinking about how people are probably grieving and remembering him – sharing stories and memories that he isn’t around to hear about.  And I thought, wouldn’t it be better to do that sort of thing while people are still alive to hear it?  Wouldn’t it be great to have someone appreciate you for simply being who you are, right now?

So I wanted to take some time to let you know that when I “Like” or
“Comment” something on your facebook page, it’s often my weak way of
running into you in the hallway at “The Former Workplace” and saying hi.

I want you to know that I am happy you exist.  I like knowing you’re still out there being who you are and living your life.  I hope you’re doing well and that your life is everything you want it to be.  And if our paths ever cross again, it won’t be soon enough.

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